Ashes Are Universal

It’s almost here, once again: Lent is almost upon us. There is something about Lent that has always bore with it a negative tone. All that talk about sacrifice, penance, and conversion makes a person think, “gosh, am I really that bad?”

Maybe Lent isn’t about how “bad” we are, but about how much better we can be! Lent starts with Ash Wednesday, and good and faithful Christians throughout the world will go to Church, listen to readings that talk about how penance, sacrifice, and conversion is something that happens in the silence of our hearts and not on a street corner. Then they will have a cross traced in ashes on their forehead, and go out into the world living their daily lives…seems a bit contradictory.

Think about where the ashes come from though. Ashes are a result of a something being burned. They are the product, or the remains of a fire. God is so often represented through fire. The Holy Spirit is always shown as a Dove dispersing tongues of fire. At our Baptism, our parents are handed a lit candle, as a symbol of the light of Christ. At Christmas we see candles as a symbol of Jesus as the Light of the World that comes into the world to scatter the darkness. When these 40 days of Lent are over, we will reach Easter, and at the great Easter Vigil, the Church blesses the new fire.

So we begin the journey with ashes, and we end with fire. The ashes, the sign to the public that we have begun this journey towards Easter is a testimony not to filth and dirt, but rather the fire which produced them, the fire that we hope to have burning at full force by Easter.

Maybe the fire within us is starting to take a beating from the winds of daily life. Maybe its down to a flickering flame. Maybe the fire needs some kindle to get it roaring again, something to feed its hunger. Maybe it needs some “fresh air” as we know fire cannot burn without oxygen. Whatever the fire in your heart needs, use these 40 days of Lent to find it!

This week I also hit a landmark in my journey with Alcoholics Anonymous. If all goes according to plan, Friday will be my 90 mark. I cant help but look at my own life. These last 90 days have been spent thinking a lot about my life. After admitting that there is a problem, the journey and the work has only just begun. I’ve spent a lot of time looking inward, examining the pain that’s in there that I never really acknowledged. I’ve thought about how I took that pain and anger out in so many other ways, and on so many other targets. I thought about all the relationships of all kinds, opportunities, and potential growth that I managed to destroy by holding on so tightly to my addiction.

All however is not ashes. Just the opposite. The ashes that remain are a reminder to me of the fire I am working towards feeding. It’s encouragement to continue to coax that flickering flame so that it will burn brighter and brighter, and larger and larger. Through my life as a Priest I can only hope that flame will somehow spread into the hearts of others.

Going 90 days without a drink is like getting the ashes on your forehead. Its an external sign of what’s going on inside. It’s a physical expression of the fire that is burning stronger and stronger everyday. I feel like this year I finally figured out a little bit more of what this Lent stuff is all about. It’s not about me being that bad. I’m pretty good actually! I have a career I enjoy. I have healthy friendships with a diverse range of people, and those friendships are real. I am enjoying living life like I never have before. I am able to just roll my eyes when I see the immaturity and foolishness of people around me (rather then jumping in or leading it). I have a spiritual life that I can see growth in a little bit at a time. These are all things I didn’t have before, and if I did, I couldn’t see them.

However, Lent is an exciting time this year because I can see how much better I can be. I can see how much more I want to grow. I can see the things I want to let go of. The even more exciting part is, I am eager to see all those things God has in store that I haven’t yet seen for myself. I was chatting with someone the other day who said to me, “I’m so happy for you, you are finally getting yourself together”. Indeed I am, but Lent proves that “getting one’s self together” is not a one time event. In fact they have a word for the process; it’s “life”. The Church is good enough to give us a 40 day season to remind us all to not get comfortable where we are, or too proud - because we could be even better.

One of the ways I would always justify my drinking was by looking at the person who was way drunker then me, and take comfort in knowing that “that one has a problem”. I’m sure that many times I provided the same misleading and false comfort to someone else. The ashes we receive on Wednesday are a reminder to all of us, that the fire could burn a lot brighter inside of us. They are a reality check, that everyone of us is on this journey called “life” and we are all in the work of “getting ourselves together”. In a way none of us are further along on the journey then anyone else, that’s why those ashes are such a powerful statement - they are the same on everybody’s forehead.